The Secret

I have a friend… that has magical powers. This friend is real, and he lives in my eyebrow. My right eyebrow. He is a single white hair in a field of brown, he has psychic powers, and his name is Shadowhawk.

“Psychic powers?” you may ask yourself. Yes, psychic powers that grow ever more powerful as he grows in length and stature. He can read minds, predict the future, and even make certain things happen. I have been having an increasing amout of these kind of psychic events happening in my life – premonitions that came about, knowing exactly what was going to happen before it happened, thinking I want something to happen and it happens, strange coincidences. For a while I thought it was me, my own psychic power increasing, and it kind of freaked me out. But recently I have come to the realization that this was actually Shadowhawk helping me out. He is my assistant, controlling the world around me, taking my thoughts and making them real and taking other peoples thoughts and putting them in my brain. Intense stuff, right?

There are, however, two problems with this recent partnership: 1) Because this relationship is relatively new, I can’t control any of this. I am subject to his magical will and pleasure. 2) Because his power is proportionate to his length it is difficult to manage the psychic-power-to-unsightly-eyebrow-hair ratio. Brittney has been helping me out and has been the one to let me know when he is getting out of control and needs to be eliminated. You would think that because of this he would dislike and fear her because she brings about his elimination, but in fact it is just the opposite. Even though she gives the execution order, he has become quite fond of her (he usually sees it coming anyway), and he likes to share his psychic powers with her when he can.

So this has been the official introduction of Shadowhawk to the world. Now try and not look at him the next time you see me – you won’t be able to avoid it. He’ll probably make you look with his magical powers anyway.